以下是发现的问题(括号括起来部分)和修改建议(用-->[ ]标注部分):
Only when you (are 60 years old,and you look back on your life. You'll)-->[look back on your life at the age of sixty will you be] aware of what you could have done better. (Besides,) -->[And] ony when you (said)-->[are sure that] you have tried your best to do (it,you'll satisfy) -->[everything will you be satisfied] with (your life)-->[the life you have so far been lived].
注:1.以only开头的句子,其主谓要倒装,所以两处you'll都要改成will you;2.aware是形容词,其前面要加be动词;3.这里“而且”应该用and或者furthermore;4.这里“可以说”的意思是“确信”,所以要用sure或absolutely certain;5.最后一句里的it指代不明,应改成everything;6.“对…满意”的英语是be satisfied with sth,不是satisfy with;7.最后的“你的一生”是指到目前为止“你已经过的生活”,所以不能简单用your life,而要用the life you have so far lived或the life you have so far been living(后者更好!)。